Self Worth and Gaining new skills with Google Digital Garage

If I asked you ‘how do you measure success?’ or ‘what makes someone successful to you?’, I wonder how you would answer. Would it be the amount of money someone makes, their job role, the size of their house or the make of their car? Or maybe something like how many kids they have? For me, it’s a difficult one to answer with success and the notion of ‘doing well’ being something that I have struggled with and that has impacted my mental health for years. I think because I never really knew what I wanted to do after school, I didn’t have a specific goal in mind for my career but as I did relatively well in the academic world, people told me things like, ‘Oh you’ll be okay, you’ll get a good job’. It is statements such as this that have made me feel like if I don’t have a ‘good job’ that I’m wasting my life and underachieving.

Over my adult life, I can’t tell you how many hours, days and weeks I have spent thinking about my (lack of) career and what I should do with my life but I’ve never really found the right path or had the lightbulb moment that so many people seem to have had. I’ve tried dozens of different avenues, looked at hundreds of options trying to find my ‘calling’ or what I am meant to do but to no avail. This really bothers me and although I have an okay job, I don’t view myself in any way as successful. I don’t fit into the business world of LinkedIn that so many people in my industry seem to thrive in and I’m unbelievably envious of those who somehow know what they want want to do and achieve their goal. In 2016, sadly Jim Carrey’s wife took her own life and just days before, she wrote a note that said she was ‘just not for this world’ and those words really stuck in my throat. I sometimes feel like this too, and alongside many other insecurities and issues I’ve had in my life, this thought has formed some of my darkest moments and I sometimes feel I’m trying to swim to the surface with an anchor around my neck – I try with all my might to get to the top but I just can’t and it’s exhausting. I have spent so much time and effort trying to improve my life but the actual impact on paper seems very little.

During one of my low and obsessive moments, someone once told me that work doesn’t matter, the people at work don’t matter, the office, my role, none of it matters and this stuff doesn’t define who you are – it’s what is at home that is important. The love in your life and the people around you are what matters and she was right, I know this, of course I do. Professional success means nothing if you have nobody to share your success with. I wish that I could get rid of this feeling of needing to ‘do well’ and learn to appreciate what I have but it’s not as simple as that. Everyone has certain thoughts that haunt them and that dance around their head in the middle of the night like flames licking the brain. Maybe one day I will feel I have ‘made it’ and the feeling will be from something humble like my little girl showing kindness to another person. Maybe that will be enough for me, to prove whatever it is that I need to prove to myself but in the meantime, I’m working on accepting that I may never reach this invisible goal that I’ve created for myself.

One of the few things that has helped ease this disappointment is the sense of achievement I felt after writing my novel ‘Birdcage’ – see my page ‘Novel’. This was an opportunity to really flex my creative muscles and gave me something physical to show for my time. It’s a bit like a trophy for me, a medallion for my marathon if you will, and this is where I’d like to offer a little ray of hope for others who may feel the same way as me. You can do things to make this better. Do things that make you feel happy and for YOURSELF! Keep learning about the world, try a new hobby, set yourself a new goal whether this is to learn some new recipes, to try a new fitness programme (couch to 5k is fab for this) or you could take a course in something you’ve always wanted to do. This is where I’ve found Google Digital Garage to be really useful and starting these online mini courses has given me some control back along with the sense of achievement I feel every time I complete a module.

Google Digital Garage

During my third trimester of pregnancy, I began to look for other things to keep me occupied over my maternity leave (because apparently looking after a baby, starting a blog and writing a second novel isn’t enough…what’s wrong with me?!) and I came across Google Digital Garage. This is a free service provided by the almighty Google giving everyone access to free short courses, live training and online resources. Courses are available in a variety of digital areas such as Data and Tech, Digital Marketing and Career Development.

Currently Google offer the ‘Fundamentals of Digital Marketing’ course which comes with certification from The Open University meaning you can add this to your CV and actually have something real to show for your time. Each course is split down in to modules and you can dip in and out whenever you like, Google automatically saves your progress. Check out the other courses they have on offer such as ‘Get a business online’ and ‘Land your next job’.

The live training webinars are great and take place via an emailed link where you watch the session live from YouTube. The sessions are fab and give you the chance to ask the trainer questions via the chat function – but don’t worry you don’t have your camera or microphone on. Sessions include ‘Social Media Strategy’, ‘Get started with analytics’ and ‘Build a CV & Write a Cover Letter’. The personal development webinars are particularly great if you’re unfamiliar with CV writing and applying for jobs. It’s a great session and details a draft guide to piecing together your life achievements and soft skills. All you need to get started is a Google or Gmail account so mosey on over there, get going and learn something new.

I hope you enjoyed this post and wish you the best of luck with any branch of personal development or self improvement you choose to take. Our modern world is sometimes a difficult place to be in as social media makes it very easy to compare yourself to others, especially with our obsession with celebrity culture boasting about dream houses and luxury holidays but the message I try to remember is that this is my life, my journey, not theirs, and at the end of the day I can either spend my time being miserable and dwelling on what I can’t change or I can try something new and fun and see where I end up.

All advice given to any situation is easier said than done so I just want to finish by saying whatever mental space you’re in at the minute, whatever thoughts that haunt you, take care of yourself and even the tiniest of steps count every day 🙂